Joke Category Doctor and nurse jokes A

A baseball manager who had an ulcer was in his physician office for a checkup. "Remember," the doctor said, "don't get excited, don't get mad,...

A man, seeking to lose some of his excess weight, visited the local doctor. John: How can I lose twelve pounds of ugly fat? Doctor: Of cou...

An old fellow came into the hospital truly on death's door due to an infected gallbladder. The surgeon who removed the gallbladder was adamant...

A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands. "Doctor," says the man ...

A nurse had to take a patient back to her room after surgery. Woman was still feeling the effects of the anesthetic and was rather confused. A...

A man goes to the eye doctor. The receptionist asks him why he is there. The man complains, "I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes." The re...

A baseball manager who had an ulcer was in his physician office for a checkup. "Remember," the doctor said, "don't get excited, don't get mad,...

A coffin was being moved when it fell off a wagon, and started down the hill. One of the morticians started chasing it. As it rolled past the ...

A doctor and a nurse were called to the scene of an accident. Doctor: We need to get these people to a hospital now! Nurse: What is it? ...

A doctor and his wife were having a big argument at breakfast. "You aren't so good in bed either!" he shouted and stormed off to work. By mi...

A doctor has come to see one of his patients in a hospital. The patient has had major surgery to both of his hands. "Doctor," says the man ...

A doctor is going round the ward with a nurse and they come to the first bed where the chap is laying half dead. "Did you give this man two tab...

A man goes to the eye doctor. The receptionist asks him why he is there. The man complains, "I keep seeing spots in front of my eyes." The re...

A man needing a heart transplant is told by his doctor that the only heart available is that of a sheep. The man finally agrees and the doctor...

A man walks into a doctor's office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear. "What's the matter...

A man went to see his doctor because he was suffering from a miserable cold. His doctor prescribed some pills, but they didn't help. On his...

A man who was very upset walked in to see his doctor. "Doctor, you've got to help me!" he wailed. "What seems to be the trouble?" asked the do...

A man, seeking to lose some of his excess weight, visited the local doctor. John: How can I lose twelve pounds of ugly fat? Doctor: Of cou...

A new arrival, about to enter hospital, saw two white coated doctors searching through the flower beds. "Excuse me," he said, "have you lost ...

A nurse had to take a patient back to her room after surgery. Woman was still feeling the effects of the anesthetic and was rather confused. A...

A nurse was showing some student nurses through the hospital. "This will be the most hazardous section in the hospital for you. The men on thi...

A pipe burst in a doctor's house. He called a plumber. The plumber arrived, unpacked his tools, did mysterious plumber-type things for a while...

A young woman went to her doctor complaining of pain. "Where are you hurting?" asked the doctor. "You have to help me, I hurt all over", said th...

An old fellow came into the hospital truly on death's door due to an infected gallbladder. The surgeon who removed the gallbladder was adamant...

At a medical convention, a male doctor and a female doctor start eyeing each other. The male doctor asks her to dinner and she accepts. As the...